Thursdays and The Most Absurd Thing I've Ever Heard

Thursday used to be my favorite day of the week.  Every Thursday marked a new week in my pregnancy.  I would receive a Baby Center email describing all the wonderful ways my baby was growing.  Today would have marked 24 weeks.  Baby H would be about 12 inches long and weigh around 1 pound, his lungs would be developing branches, his brain would be rapidly growing and taste buds developing. 

Our 20 week scan was also on a Thursday, turning my favorite day to the most dreaded day of the week.  The day we found out every Thursday going forward would be a day of emptiness, a day of what could have been.  I know Thursdays won’t always mark a could have been week, but for now they make me sad.

I recently posted on Facebook a link to an article about what not to say to a miscarriage survivor.  What I heard yesterday will not show up on any of those lists, but by far takes the cake for anything I’ve heard.  I don’t work in a conventional office where I have a ton of people around me all day long, which these days I’m quite thankful for.  I work in retail and have an office in the back of one of my stores.  For the most part I fly solo all day, but I do venture out on the sales floor and backroom to interact with the store team.  Yesterday, I was headed to the backroom and ran into an associate that I haven’t seen since we lost the baby.  I guess it was out of sheer shock at the change in my appearance i.e. missing baby bump, but still not an excuse.  Here’s how it played out:

Associate:   “WHOAH!  You’re deflated.” 

Me:  “Ummm, I lost the baby”

Associate:  “Seriously?”

Me:  “Ummm, yes seriously, 3 weeks ago”

Associate:  “Oh my God, I’m so sorry”

Is she for real????  After that I turned and continued on my way not entirely sure what else to say to the girl.  She clearly was embarrassed and felt bad, but it’s not my job to make her feel better.  It’s not my fault she is insensitive and lacks a filter.  I’m proud of myself because I did not have a total breakdown after this.  In hindsight I find the absurdity of it comical.  From here on out I don’t think there is the possibility of hearing anything worse. 

Lesson for all:  think before you speak. (Although I think most people already know this rule, the girl yesterday still needs to study up or limit her human interactions.)