Friday, April 20, 2012

The Second Verse


The other night dear
As I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms
When I awoke dear
I was mistaken
And I held
My head
And cried

All my life I’ve found joy in the first verse of this song, but the second verse has become my new reality.  It’s been a tough week.  So many people I know are reveling in the first verse, their lives are full of sunshine and happiness.  It’s a very weird feeling to be so happy for others but be lost in the pits of my own grief. Don’t get me wrong, my life isn’t total darkness.  I have a wonderful husband, lots of loving family and friends, I am healthy, I have a home and a job.  I am very thankful for these things.  I just can’t shake the feeling that I’ve been short changed.  I was given a taste of the dream and what my future could be holding my sweet baby.  It’s very hard to watch other people actually living the dream.  I know in my heart that someday my dreams will come true, but for now it’s just really really hard. 

6 comments:

  1. You Are My Sunshine has always been one of my favorite songs... every year I have my Kindergarten students sing it to their parents at our end of the year celebration. I've always stuck to just the first verse because the second made me too sad. Now it makes me sadder. :( I'm so sorry the second verse is our current reality and I pray for the day when the first verse is the song again in our hearts. <3

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  2. My sons name is Jayden and I sing the first verse changing words to make it more personal.. After reading the 2nd verse tears swell up and pour out like a fountain, My son will be 2 years old this May and I have not held him in my arms once. I too was given a short 10 min taste in my son's sweet presence.My deepest condolences to any parents who have to know the 2nd verse by experience. I pray God will comfort and hold us in arms of our loved ones,

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  3. Ever since January 30th 2004 my life has been rich with love ❤ my daughter Kalika is and always will be my whole life and happiness. One day my husband and I got into a physical fight and the police showed up just as our then 8yr daughter was getting off the bus. They ended up putting her in foster care for 3 months. It nearly destroyed me and my husband. Thankfully we got her back after jumping through every idiotic hoop they put in front of us. We were lucky and worked hard but not everyone has such a positive experience with cps. I pray for all the children and parents that are separated from each other tonite and pray that God gives you comfort and strength. Never stop fighting for your dreams.

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  5. This is a very old post, but I just stumbled upon it. I made up my own second verse years ago because the real one makes me too sad!
    I now sing it to my son every night.

    And now tonight, Dear,
    As you lay dreaming,
    Will you please hold me in your heart?
    When you awaken,
    I'll be beside you,
    And I'll hold
    You in
    My arms.

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